MeSane, Yousane, HeSane, WhoSane?

Meltdowns are becoming more regular.  Got a list of excuses a mile high for them (not enough sleep, too much work, can't switch off, etc etc ad nauseum!)

All the reasons for my emotional behaviour seem so rational at the time.  I carefully analyse my reasoning, having the conversations in my head, any possible objections shot down in flames.

I finally break and admit my defeat. His responses so clear, so concise.  Completely opposing and also completely rational. My own reasoning crumbling before my very eyes.

I suddenly feel foolish, my folly becoming obvious, my horse of rationale bolting for the door.

Why is it that when other people seek advice from me, I can see their predicament with complete clarity, their sometimes distorted visions glaringly obvious. Both sides of the story generally in panoramic view.

My reasoning this time? The heart is the twisted sister, obscuring the eyes from all that is evident. Only when the mind is clear from the heart's rose coloured spectacles can it truly see.

Bloody B Dubs!

This happens to me a lot. I know I only got a likkle car, but sheesh!

So I am in the right hand lane, about halfway through overtaking a b-double truck, or I am travelling alongside one on the freeway.

When you are about parallel with the middle of their extra long load, they will indicate to want to be in my lane.

I have a panic attack. Sometimes I think I could wee myself.

What's the etiquette here?  I'm in the middle of them, so I either have to speed up to get past them, or slam on the brakes so they go past me and hope that any guys behind me are paying attention.

Why do they always have to do it when I am in the middle?

(x marks the spot where I usually am when they start indicating!!!)

Losing my Anonimity

I haven't been here for a while. I was seduced by Facebook and generally been taken over by my life.
I was doing really well.  I had 5 balls in the air, and was juggling successfully.
Eyes focussed on the prize, the Universe and I bosom buddies. I was listening to "her" direction (the Universe has gotta be female to be that wise, huh girls?)
Everything was working out.

Turns out this Universe chick has an evil sense of humour.

Thing is, I asked, and she gave.  Cause that is what happens. You ask, and she gives. You don't have to ask how, or why, or whether you deserve it.  You ask, and there it is.

I just didn't expect it so soon.  My request was meant for after my 5 year plan was complete. I wanted to chew one piece at a time.  With a wry grin, she gave me the whole cake!  Cheeky bugger!

I was juggling 5 balls, so she threw me a chainsaw.

I used to be able to do cute little tweets or status updates. I knew what they meant, my little release to the world, cryptic.  Nowadays, too many people get their meaning.

So I'm here, back under my rock, sheltering for a while in total anonimity. Where I can release without being judged, watched or "liked". 

Isn't is amazing how one little chainsaw can make all the other balls feels so heavy, so hard to handle!?

Light Bulb Moment

Ok, so I was walking through the shopping centre, wondering why I had insisted on wearing these godawful heels when I knew damn well I was going to have to walk round the shops, when I had an epiphany..

Why doesn't someone invent telescopic heels?  That way you can have the sophisticated high heel vamp look for work, or the races, but then when your feet get sore and you need flats, you press a button the side of the shoe and adjust the heel so it disappears into the shoe. Aaaah! comfy shoes instantly!

I was so amazed with myself that I had to rush straight home (albeit with burning soles) and blog about it.

Hmmm better just check first that no-one else has this before I declare it as my idea.

Dammit! Someone already had the idea in 1960!
and a similar one came out as early as 1956!

As I was born in the 70's I guess I can't say that I thought of it first! Wonder why they never caught on?

Even Chanel had a light bulb moment about shoe heels:

Wikileaks

Cool Things I found This Week

Guy from States is making dirty cars into works of art.

The thing that astounds me most is that he's not just drawing a picture, he's actually removing dirt to reveal the picture.

A truly remarkable talent on a truly remarkable artist.

Emperors new Clothes?

Was catching up on my news, current affairs and general media bullshit, when I came across this article.

I acknowledge I am not particularly fashion conscious, and certainly not an avid follower or trend-setter (eeek, just writing the word trendsetter makes me sound like my mom!)

I further acknowledge that I do need to wear glasses most of the time, and am not particularly observant.

However, surely I am not the only one who can see they are talking about 2 completely different dresses!

They are, aren't they?

Grylled Nuts

There seems to be an increasingly frequent mention of Bear Grylles... the man who can survive anywhere or anything.
I would love to lock him in an empty room and shout "Get out of that ya bastard" with an evil Mwah ha ha!

Discovered there is even a Bear Grylles drinking game! Not one for the faint hearted either.. so 1 pot screamers beware!

And for a Chuck Norris-esque laugh once in a while - check out the Bear Grylls Quotes and Facts

my fav.... Bear Grylls doesnt walk places….he spins the earth to wherever he wants to go!

The wonders of Stupidity

I have been meaning to post this for a while.  Finally got it transferred from my phone

And for those smart asses - yes I know I shouldn't be driving while I have a mobile in my hand, but I think my bending the law can be overlooked in view of the sheer incredible lunacy of their actions.

Truly Inspirational

From the Universe

Everything you give, you get back, times seven.

Plus, what you give, grows, times seven.
Plus plus, there's a little known intergalactic algorithm that states whenever love is added to the giving, a wish draws ever closer to the giver. Whoa!
     I give it all to you,
          The Universe

Mixed Nuts

Check out this rendition of Poker Face using only kitchen appliances and a guitar!

My Favourite Things

I just love this ad... CARROT - Can't Achieve Rewards Regardless Of Time... perfect!

Marketing Imagination

So, I get a special offer to purchase some JVC earphones at a discount.  Various colours available.  Those Kooky marketing execs have gone the extra mile and selected a fruit to go with the colour:

I was imagining the conversation around the whiteboard:

BOSS: "So, we got 9 colours - and we need something fruity to go with them.... any suggestions?"
EXEC1: "Well we got Lemon Yellow, Lime Green"
BOSS: "Lemon Yellow ok, but lime's too obvious - anything else.."
EXEC2: "Erm.... Kiwi?"
BOSS: "Perfect! - now what about red....Strawberry or Raspberry?"
EXEC1: "Erm, Strawberry, cause traditionally Raspberry is Blue"
EXEC2: "Yeah, but Raspberries aren't REALLY blue are they - lets be different... we'll go with Raspberry Red.."

EXEC1: "But then what about the Blue?"

EXEC2: "Well, we got Blueberries?"

EXEC1: "That's even more obvious!... what else ya got?"

EXEC2: "Errrrr... Peppermint?"

BOSS: "Interesting, not really a fruit, but certainly confectionary... Hmmmmm - I like it!"

EXEC1: "So, if we're keeping away from the obvious, what are we going to call the orange one?  An orange is just orange?"

EXEC2: "Well, there are different types or oranges, what about blood orange?"

EXEC1: "yuk, too Vampiric, what about Valencia"

BOSS: "ooooooh, that's GREAT!  What's left?"

EXEC2: "Erm, we got the Black, White, Purple"

EXEC1: "OK, Do we want Plum or Grape for Purple?"
EXEC2: "Grapes are green"
EXEC1: "They can be purple"
EXEC2: "Aren't they called red grapes... like red wine?"
BOSS: "Yeah, but they are more purple than red really... I'm liking Grape, we'll go with that.  Now, what's Black?"
EXEC1: "Raisins, Prunes?"
EXEC2: "That's dried fruit, doesn't count!"
EXEC1: "Is Olive a fruit or vegetable?"
EXEC2: "It's a fruit - But hardly fruity or "gummy" - wouldn't Licorice be better?"
BOSS: "Olive is perfect! Well done! - got anything for white?"
Silence for about 5 minutes, other than the humming of a projector....
EXEC2: "Spearmint?"
EXEC1: "We already got a mint...."

EXEC2: "Milk?"

EXEC1: "Hardly fruity..."

EXEC2: "well, neither is Olive, but you got that one thru..."

BOSS: "Coconut Milk!... Yes, coconut - Fantastic!"

*Smug grin*

BOSS: "So, that's it, well done chaps!"

EXEC1: "Erm, we forgot Pink..."

BOSS: "Dammit! Pink, what's pink?"

EXEC2: "well, we could go really exotic with this one, like Guava, Dragonfuit, or Pink Grapefuit, or theres...."

EXEC1: "Peach?"

EXEC2: "Peach????"
EXEC1: "Peach"
EXEC2: "But peaches are peach colour, not pink"
EXEC1: "There are sorta pinky peach, like a baby's bum"
EXEC2: "But the headphones are a vibrant pink, an exotic pink, they are just crying out for something tropical"
BOSS: "Oh, Peach will do, I gotta get off and do the school run anyway"
EXEC2: "But..."
BOSS: "Great job guys, let's go..."

Cool things I found this week

I had to sell some tyres for work, so put them on e-bay.  First I did a quick bit of research to see what the competition would be like, and what sort of things people put in their description.

I came across this sale: TYRES 18" (2) BOTH BLACK, ROUND, SMELL LIKE RUBBER


You HAVE to check out the description.. please click on the link cause it's too big to post here.
 
I felt compelled to post a question:
Hi there, I don't really wanna buy them, but I live close by and wondered if I can come over and have a wiff sometime. I love the smell of rubber.


And to my absolute joy today I got a response:
Dear bluehappybunny,
I can see you are a kindred spirit, and obviously a connoisseur of the fine rubbery fragrances. Such enthusiasm, and love for the rubberous pong must of course not be dampened. So please feel free to come by and do what happy bunny's do with the tyres. Who knows, we might be blessed with the sound of little screaching bunny tyres in 9 months time!!

From the Universe

Everything is FANTASTIC!

Your life is amazing.
And money does grow on trees.
      You're welcome,
                The Universe

Plus, you're a supercoolhappylovething and it's Friday.

How I get Sidetracked and Repulse myself.

So I'm doing the Global Corporate Challange right, and I get an e-mail from one of my team members.

He is a huge show-off, knocking up 30,000 + steps in 1 day and telling everyone about it, putting my measly 11,000 steps to shame.

Anyhoo, he is taking credit for putting up a picture of the A-Team on our team page.  The fact that we called our team the A team the fact that he put it up there seemed a bit of a no-brainer, but I did admire the fact that he used a pic of the old A-Team, not the new One. (pic he posted above)

His E-mail was thus:
That photo is my doing. I wanted to get Mr T in there and make it clear that Rampage Jackson has no place in...well anything. He's a rubbish fighter.

This started my intrigue, and my ever wandering mind began to investigate.  I assumed from the e-mail that this was the "new" Mr T - but was unsure of his origins so went to trusty IMDB to investigate.
Sure enough,  BA Baracus is being played by an ex-wrestler.  Cheesy or wot! Having said that, he does seem to fit the bill.
I then noticed this news article, which enticed me enough to find out more...
Which brought me to discover that some of the original A-Team cast were playing cameos in the new one. KOOL methinks - then goes to investigate which ones.

My favourite character was Howling Mad Murdoch, cause he made me laugh, and I had a crush on Face.
They both appear in the new movie - yippee!
I go through their profiles:  Dwight Schultz appears to be favouring being away from the cameras these days, preferring to specialise in voice overs - the list is almost endless!
Then check out my fav, Dirk Benedict - profile main picture doesn't make him look any older, would be keen to find out what he looks like now, surely he must have changed a little bit... checked his date of birth.

OMG!

He was born in 1945 - that makes him 65 - the same age as my DAD! eeeeewwwww! I had a crush on someone who was my dad's age! He is approaching retirement age!
I feel dirty!

Cool Things I found This week

I guess I'm feeling melancholy this week, or maybe just searching for motivation....

This is from the Blogess photo stream. The more I see of her, the more I am completely amazed by her, and completely jealous of her!

She also led me to this....

Spot the Difference

Being a Fleet Manager and general subscriber to crap, I often get advertising e-mails.  Todays special little beauty was from NewFarmmachinery.com.au.

Normally I just delete them, but one of their feature articles on a new Bale Wrapper Range caught my eye.

I felt sure I have seen this design before

Yep that's right, I think they have appointed Hanna or Barbera as their vehicle designer.

A Question for Spammers

Are you still making money from your wicked ways?  Does investing in those awful autobots and phishing tools make it worth your while?

Surely the odds are these days that if your e-mails manage to fight past the firewalls and spam filters and junk folders, the best they get is a click of the delete button.

Are there still people out there that are stupid enough to click on your links for penis enlargements and hot lusty women?